December 18, 2009

If It Happens, I Deserved It Probably.

I don’t think I will be raped this morning but at the least there is a possibility of forced intercourse which might also be considered rape. I don’t think it will really happen, probably. He is a huge man, so it is definitely something he could accomplish if he set his mind to it. That is the part where this will either come together or fall apart: him setting his mind to it. He’s set his mind to things before and I’ve had to push him away each of those times. The problem is that sometimes I was a second or two late in the pushing; all of the small doses I shouldn’t have encouraged.

Reminding him he has a girlfriend doesn’t seem to be very effective. Relationship facts don’t seem to concern him. Sometimes this problem is mutual. I shouldn’t be so welcoming sometimes. I probably should act appropriately more often. I am a double-edged sword or a stupid woman.

Yesterday he told me he had a Christmas present for me: a perfect square and in his wallet. He said some more things and then he did some things that he’d never done before and things I would’ve never agreed to. Things are escalating. He reminded me we’d be alone for four hours this morning. I made a strong voice and my mouth said sentences that indicated he’d better leave me alone. He laughed in a way that made me feel I should lock doors. I honestly don’t think he will rape me, but I still wore a belt with these jeans and I wouldn’t be fully coming clean if I didn’t mention I put on these pink and black lace panties this morning, just in case.

3 brave people:

gamefaced said...

boom!

rollerfink said...

oh snap, brilliant first sentence. and last. and the middle ones.

oh, look, my word verification is "the guy from weird science (not anthony michael hall)" but i can't remember his name. hold on i'll look it up. ah, it's ilan mitchell-smith. hmm, i woulda never got that. these word verifications are getting harder.

wiredwriter said...

The sexy panties always do the trick.